


In my mind I am my own God

by TheFallenValkyrie



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: A snail is faster than me at this point, Angst, Gavin of all people deserved better, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, RK900 deserves better, Rating is there for a reason, Serial Killer, So much angst, Tags May Change, Tina deserves better, Undercover Missions, can one call it slow burn if there is just a gigantic fire and everybody is crying, hurt/ little comfort, my first fanfic and i hate myself lmao, no beta reader we die like men, this gonna be sad fellas
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-09-01 12:18:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16765000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFallenValkyrie/pseuds/TheFallenValkyrie
Summary: RK900 comes to the conclusion that the Detective has more to hide of his past then he lets on. Neither are the other Officers willing to share their knowledge with him. He was built to investigate, but the Detective doesn't let his guard down. Until he does.** My dudes my fellas this gonna be a wild and sad ride**





	1. What is it to you?

**Author's Note:**

> Please be aware that english isn't my first language (nor my second for that matter lmao) and there might be mistakes I wasn't aware of when I posted the chapter.
> 
> A little clue, RK900 is in the mids of deviating but not realizing it (this will change in later chapters for reasons) so he simply patches up software instabilities where he can :)

''This Undercover Mission will help us to bust one of the biggest Red Ice Distributors in Detroit, the Officer chosen for this mission has o keep a low profile for a while. We plan a 2-months probation phase, in this phase one of you will have to embody your faux persona in the most beliveble way possible. We have gathered information about the culprits, please keep in mind that contact to the prencit will be reduced to nearly zero, so it would be welcomed if you already have a contact person in mind. Any Volunteers?''

Fowler's voice boomed through the Precinct. The normally lively place was eerily silent, nobody seemed too keen on playing Bait for the DPD when it comes to one of Detroit's most dangerous Red Ice dealers. Fowler's stern face didn’t gave his displeasure awav ''Acompleshing this mission will grant a Promotion, a good way to climb up the ladder if you ask me.“ He added without blinking an eye.

RK900 together with the other Androids where standing on the sides, they where automatically disregarded as potational volunteers, Androids didn’t have any history amongst the Dealers unless it was for gathering thirium for the production. RK900 against his better judgment or on his case his system looked up enclosurd Information about the Dealers, and found himself deeply unsettled that Fowler was not poiting out the obvious dangers the culprits and their henchman could be for the volunteer. Many Deaths have been pin pointed to them, gruesome at best, downright horrifying at worst. RK900’s LED swirled red for a blink moment before turning into a calm blue, the Software Instability popping up while reading thru the files didn’t really bothered him as long as he could patch hem up. Whoever would volunteer should have already been used in undercover missions, an unexperienced officer would meet their fate quite quickly RK900 concluded.

A heavy sigh emerged from the crowd, RK900’s attention fell to the crowd before him once again, a hand rose up,arm clad in leather instead of a uniform and RK900’s unimpressed face turned into a little frown. "Apparently none of yer fackers have the balls to do it, always up to me to get the fucking shit done.“ Gavins bitter expression towards Fowler was telling enough, and Fowler nodded expectingly towards him as if he didn’t expect no one other than Gavin to volunteer.

RK900 didn’t like where this is going to, he surely read up into his partners files, never the enclosed ones , perhaps there lied the answer on why Gavin would so gradually throw himself into danger. "You never fail to surprise me Reed, now into my Office. Take your chosen reliable person with you.“ He looked expectably to Tina Chen, but to Fowler's surprise Gavin called for RK900. "Come on Terminator, we got some profiling to do!“ RK900’s led flashed yellow "Terminator? Thats a new one Detective.“ "Well I belive it to be quite fitting, would you like me going back to Oversized Roomba then?“ RK900 looked at him for a moment " I would prefer if you either called me by my designation or a Human name.“ Before Gavin could give an answer Fowler shmashed a stack of Files to his table.

"Alright if your married couple problems are solved by now we can turn your much needed attention to the really important things, whilst I agree with RK900 that an appropriate name will be needed for him, Gavin you can’t enter this mission underprepared. You of all people should know what can happen,“ Gavin remained still staring at the table looking quite angry and unsatisfiyed. " and therefore I’ll will need you to take this god damn mission as serious as possible. You surely are aware of the dangers you will be facing there, we will need you to take up your training, instead of 2 days, 4 days you will train your body and refresh your material arts.“ Gavin nodded wordlessly going thru the files, frown growing bigger with every passing site.

System Instabilities popped up once again, RK900 didn’t paid them attention, he wanted to understand what Fowler was referring to that made Gavin so angry. Whilst yes his Partner was quite a handful sometimes he didn’t disregard the fact that Gavin has earned his Title for a reason. That was probably the reason why RK900 couldn't understand Gavins readiness to fling himself into danger when RK900 was there to just prevent exactly that. He took a note for himself to read up on Gavins files again, his humans safety was after all his prime mission and _he never fails his mission._

RK900 waited in front of Gavin‘s Car, the briefing was over, the Detective would gather small belongings and start his probation time until it was time to get a move on the dealers. The Detective came out with Officer Chen, apparently giving last instructions after Reed leaves for his mission. "Gav I have taken care of your Cats before, there is nothing I possibly don’t know about them“ a sneer "How can you say that?“ a sharp glance from Chen " I had them with me when you where away by your last undercover mission…and they survived just fine with me.“ Reed looks at RK900 standing and waiting "yeah yeah you got a point…when they move me to that shithole just make sure they don’t forget me, i have to go, Terminator is already waiting for me.“ He muttered and gave one last smirk towards Chen, who just knowingly smirked back.

"You will be taking care of this tresure here when I am away ok? Don’t let anybody else touch it!“ The Android just looked at him like a confused puppy "Detective, according to Fowlers briefing you are only allowed to leave for urgent matters, you won’t leave the housing until it’s time for the infiltration.“ "Ya ya i know now get in here, no changing the music, my car my music. Got it?“ RK900 entered the car obediently next to Gavin.

He wasn’t really surprised by the music style Reed played, he just thought it would be in the Detectives native language, the Display read „Rammstein – Halt“ "Your Music taste is quite something Detective, do you even know what they are singing about?“ "Of course dipshit. I’ve seen them live only once but still, their songs have a hidden message, you can only cherish that if you understand the language, simply translating their songs don’t do the trick.“ "So you are well versed in the German language? It wasn't mentioned in your file“ RK900 mused Gavin snorted "that Band was the only reason for me to learn it in the first place. Didn't bother including it in my cv unless i’ve wanted to be exploited to fetch drunk german tourists from Bars for the rest of my life.“ Gavin looks at the Android at a red light "Nein Danke.“

RK900 stared at Gavin 'full of surprises indeed' he mused while continuing to listen to the song.

 _Ich bin jetzt anders, sie haben mich geändert_

'How oddly fitting perhaps the text has any sentimental value to Gavin?‘ "What made you listen to them in the first Place Detective ?“ Gavins gaze turned distant for a Moment as if he reviewed it for a last time "…..my father liked listening to them, so did my best friend. I was exposed to their music since a young age and wanted to understand the deeper meaning oft he possible interpretations and for that you need some sweet complicated german knowledge."

"what is your interpretation of the song Detective?“

_Niemand quält mich so zum Scherz ich bringe licht an euer Herz, die Entscheidung fällt nicht schwer ich geh jetzt heim und hole mein Gewehr_

Gavin threw a quick glance at the Android to his side before turning his attention towards the road "You are a Computer, you of all beings should be well versed in german too so i don’t need to explain jack shit to you.“ "That is true but id like to hear yours, I already have formed mine.“ Gavin squinted his eyes "You would ‚like ‚ to..ok fine I belive it to be a Song about an Individual that suffered bulling and went on a killing spree to get revenge on the people who have wronged them. Short version.“

Gavin halted in front of his apartment complex and got out without bothering to look back at the Android stuck in his car. "I will call you when i need something so don’t bother showing up unannounced.“ He called out before entering the building. RK900 sat in Gavins car staring at the headboard Software instabilities popping up yet again whom he patched up absently, he noticed the keys still stuck in the keyhole and recalled Gavins order of taking care of it during his absence ,apparently this already count’s as absence‘ Nines changed places and started the old motor, went home to review the tasks at hand, in mind to read up on Detectives band. Maybe the way to his good side was thru music.


	2. The other side of you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I Hope the text doens't look too wird (wierd?) Since i am uploding on mobile! Hope you enjoy this Chapter!

Gavin let out a frustrated sigh he held in since leaving the precinct. 'Fucking mission, of course it had to be me now didn’t it?' he opened the door to his small apartment, his Cat Flacke greeting him after he noticed his owners mood. Taking the cat into his armshe snuggled up to the soft fur "Tina will keep good care of you and the others… damn I already miss you, you furry bastard" he laughed while Flake tried tap his paws on Gavin's face he noticed the green eyes looking at him from the dark void of his bedroom, Till didn’t seem too keen on leaving his spot on the bed. He went towards the bathroom for a quick shower. He needed to really get his mind ready for this, Fowler was right, one mistake and he was going to end up in a Trash Dump.  The faux persona was a quite simple one 'just what kind of name is Ludwig Schmied' he thought absently, he stared at the mirror then shrugged 'I can use my german to assert my dominance' like back at school where he ate an entire Apfelstrudel by himself during a Association meeting. His stomach growled 'Damn why didn’t I order Tin Can to get some groceries, Pizza it is then' the water started to spray his body, relaxing only for the short moment of the shower. After getting out he revalued his options, he decided for a visit, dressed in more presentable clothes he walked to his destination.

  
He really didn't like Hospitals. They smell Way too clinical for his liking and passing certain stations also like death. But he always made sure to visit _him_. Out of a habit he knocked on the door, to his surprise, a Nurse, a human One he noticed, opened it. "Oh I didn't know Mister Reed had visitors! Ill tidy up real quick, Hope you don't mind!"  she exclaimed cheerily, a harsh contrast to the other Nurses he has met, Android and human alike." Are you… Family?" "Yeah his Son actually, Name's Gavin." Must be a Newbie, the other Nurses knew him, of course they did, its hard to ignore their pitying looks. "Oh I am Happy that you Take your time to visit him!" He entered the room, still too plain, too white. "You are new here arent you?" he calmly asked, his gaze falling to the person on the bed. His chest feeling Way to tight once again, it never got easier.  The Nurse looked taken aback wide eyed "The others know who I am. I've been visiting him for years now." He walked Next to the bed and Sat on the little chair "Nothing new about his vitals I suppose?" The question was asked out of respect, his vitals haven't changed since the last time he was here. The Nurse saw thru it and excused herself and closed the door behind her.  
  
RK900 decided to read into Gavin's mission parameters, the basics building into the fact of the execution of Detectives accurate performance as his faux Persona "Perhaps it will help Detective Reeds Performance if he can act in front of a Person, I should share this possibility with him." His LED unknowingly to him blinking yellow with small impulses of red.   
He revalued his options. He could use public transportation, it would Take the same time as using Reeds car 'But the chance of bypassers Touching it would be unpredictable' even after the Revolution it wasn't really heard of Androids owning cars, and there where still Humans around who could misinterpreted the Situation and cause property violations. He decided in taking the car. He could keep an eye on it if needed.

  
Starting the motor he Made bis Way to Detective Reed’s Apartment Complex, upon reaching his Destination he was greeted with a closed door, and upon Scanning the Inside with an empty Apartment. Not counting the Felines whom he guessed where of different breeds if the Detectives Hoodie covered in cat hairs was anything to go by. Software Instabilities appeared, 'Detective Reed wasn't nesecirly Grounded for that matter but he didnt Need to leave the Apartment either, where could he be' RK900's LED turning yellow, he wasn't a Fan of breaching his Partners Privacy but Tracking down his mobile Phone was something he had done since the day he was partnered up with the Detective.

'Saint Andrews Hospital.. wasn't the Detective feeling good that he had to Seek medical attention?'  RK900 wanted to disregard that fact, he had Gavin's vitals always at hand and he hadn't showed any symptoms, but for some reason the Android couldn't calm his processor, so he returned to the car and drove to his next Location.  
"Welcome, I am WK800, how can I help you?" the Android looked at RK900 with slight confusion "My Partner Detective Gavin Reed, is he well?  His location indicates that he might have suffered injuries that require Medical attention." He told the Android and tensed his jaw when the Android gave him a blank stare "Mister Reed Junior is not booked in as a patient, as a Visitor that is another story, I can give you the Room he most likely is now." The Android held out his wrist, the white chassis shining thru it.

RK900 accepted the offer, gave his Thanks and followed the instructions until he was in front of the door, he could hear a low muffled voice, the beeping sound of Machines, he didn't knock when he entered, his Audio processors immediately Catching up on the foreign Language that was spoken, Translating it in time. He took in the scene in front of him, Gavin sitting with his back half to him a Man lying in the Hospital bed was promptly scanned by his Software, a pop up appearing in his Vision 'Gerald Reed- Born 1970.12 23.  – Next of Kin Gavin Reed' he pushed the pop up to the side saving it for later, in Gavin's hand was a Book he was reading out from.

  
_Oh, Andromeda, I can see you._  
_You were never as close as you are nowadays_  
_There a miracle befell my eyes _  
_And every pore now celebrates _  
_The white horse will be my fate _  
_Trumpets blare out over every tent_  
_Proclaiming victory over all time_  
_But rank and lodge remain empty_  
_And it does not become dark at night _

  
RK900 listened with newfound interest, Gavin's voice a steady soft tune as he spoke. His LED glowing Yellow, an absent thought crossed his mind, how he wishes that Gavin would talk to him like that, no insults or yelling, just this soothing voice he didn't knew the Detective had. Gavin looked up from to the book to his side. Tired Grey Green eyes met Blue ones. He couldn't muster a scoff so let out a heavy loud sigh. „What are you doing here, Tin Can?“ he said with a low voice. No annoyance or venom heard in it. RK900 looked back at him, closing the door, keeping an appropriate distance.

„I have a proportion for you that you should consider Detective. But if you wish, we can have this Conversation another time, I didn't meant to Interrupt.“ Gavin closed the Book and put it back onto the small shelf that hung near the door passing RK900 „I was about to go anyways, you got my car with you Terminator?“ „Of course“ the Android said with a monotone voice „Good because I have to get groceries, got nothing at home.“ He walked out of the Room. RK900 closes the door and followed the Detective down the corridor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are we getting somewhere? Most likely.  
> Are we getting there soon? Not likely.
> 
> The peom in the fanfic is 'Viva Andromeda' by Till Lindemann.
> 
> Please let me know what you think about it!

**Author's Note:**

> I based my Gavin on a friend who works at the Police force, with the slight difference that my friend speaks Russian as a secret language instead of German. Basically a good chunk of Gav's personality is based on my friend.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this first chapter, I'll try to update it asap!
> 
> The Song: Rammstein - Halt
> 
> Please share your thoughts with me! please be nice, I'm a fragil witch.


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